End of an Era

When my oldest was three months old, I realized quickly that I could not go back to work two days each week as originally planned. There was no way I was leaving him with anyone else. I also quickly realized that I would need to make a little money so that my husband and I could occasionally go out for an ice cream or something. Fortunately, my neighbor and friend across the street needed someone to take her 4 and 6 year old after school two days each week. They are such sweet kids and five years later, my two kids look up to them almost as if they were an older brother and sister.

Since my first daycare job went so well, I decided to take on another little boy two days each week when my oldest turned one. This boy was just a week younger than my son. I thought it would be cute for my son to have a little friend to pal around with. Anyone who has twin boys knows where this post is eventually heading.

After 4 years of escapades, my son's friend, whom he dubbed "Buddy" early on is leaving us to start kindergarten. Our neighbors across the street have also moved to a neighboring borough. It's a bittersweet week for us all. In honor of my four year daycare career, I would like to offer the following highlights from my son and his "Buddy":

• At the age of 18 months, they loaded my nativity set into the
  dishwasher. My son appeared to be directing this effort.
• At the age of 19 months, they figure out how to turn on the dishwasher.
• At the age of 23 months, they attempt to swing from my dining room chandelier
• At the age of 2, spend the morning howling like wolves after the zillionth viewing of Balto
• At the age of 2 1/2, use lincoln logs to attack the dog while I have severe morning sickness
• And the piece de resistance, at the age of 3, used buckets of water to flood my entire finished basement. They especially enjoyed dumping the water on the couch cushions and themselves.
  

Surrounded by Lies

It is finally cool here in Pittsburgh. Instead of 94, it's only around 70 degrees. It feels great to be outside again watching my kids comfortably play instead of turning bright red and sweaty after only 5 minutes outside.

Of course, today is the day that they want to play with water guns. They want them filled right at 5:30pm while I am in the middle of preparing dinner. As any mom could guess, I say no - it's too cold and I am too busy. Next thing I know the hose is on and my two year old is in the middle of the flowing water trying to fill her water gun. I clearly tell her not to turn on the hose again or she will have to come inside and go in her crib. Within one minute, she is standing in the flowing water again with a water gun in her hand. My five year old, no surprise here, is happily pointing out her indiscretion.

I stop what I'm doing and very angrily plop the two year old in her crib where she is screaming over her punishment. My five year old scampers across the street to play with a friend. I finish dinner and think nothing more of it. After all, my two year old's disobedience is a constant throughout the day.

At dinner, the two year starts to chatter about the five year old turning on the hose and the five year old starts to look guilty. Since I was way too close to this situation, I let my husband handle the five year old's disobedience and lies while I cleaned the kitchen feeling so bad that I had punished the two year old for nothing. She gets in trouble enough on her own. After a long talk with dad and no brownie for dessert, the five year old appears and apologizes to both me and his sister. His sister smiles widely at him, says "I sorry too" and gives him a big hug. Amazing the things a two year old can teach you when you are paying attention - things like how to forgive completely when wronged and love again.

The Greencards

A couple of weeks ago I had a few moments to myself. The little one was napping, my son was playing quietly in his room, and even the dog was being quiet. I decided to get a cup of tea and watch a little bit of CMT (Country Music Television). In the afternoons, they usually play videos of true country and bluegrass music. Rare that you will see a Faith Hill or Shania Twain video in the afternoons. They call it Wide Open Country.

I was reading an email on the computer when a song caught my attention. At first I thought it must be AKUS - it certainly sounded similar. Instead, it was a group that I had never heard of called The Greencards singing a song that I had never heard called "Time." The song was beautiful and from the genre they are now calling "newgrass" plus the video was just so cool. It took place in a 70's roller rink and the lead singer was wearing a butterfly t-shirt. Anyone in their 30s or 40s would love the video - it will definitely bring back some memories. There is even a boy wearing tube socks pulled up to his knees.

So, I head over to The Greencards website. Click here if you would like to take a look. The first odd thing I notice is that two of the members are from Australia and one is from Great Britain. Since neither of those countries can boast a huge bluegrass following, they each made their way to Texas so that they could play their music for people who love it. Even I figured out quickly how they picked the name for their group. The three met up in 2004 and have been making beautiful music ever since. I just purchased their lastest album, weather and water, from amazon and love it. If you like bluegrass and especially if you like AKUS, check them out. Click here to see the video for their latest single, "Time" or to listen to some of their other songs. You won't be disappointed.

I, Swimming

Seventeen years ago I was a competitive swimmer, lifeguard, and taught many a child to swim. Of course I thought my children would love the water as much as I do and jump right in and start swimming with little help from me. Isn't that the way it works?

My five year old son has done well. He is now floating, swimming a bit underwater, and loves to be in the pool. He would go everyday if we let him. He's always loved to be in the pool and has never had much fear of it. My two year old daughter is another story. She refuses to get in the pool and spends her time at the pool just walking around it and crying anytime I try to pick her up to bring her into the pool. It's a pretty funny sight to see her prancing around the perimeter of the pool in her bathing suit with the built in inflatables. She looks like a little pink turtle.

On Saturday, I had reached my limit. This is my daughter, and there is no way she isn't going to love the water! I got out of the pool, picked her up, and while she was crying sang the "I'm Getting Eaten by a Boa Constrictor" song that I had used with some success years ago to get reluctant little ones into the pool. Before she could protest too much, she was in the pool, and up to her chest. Within 30 seconds, she was in her Dad's arms floating around and squealing with laughter. She starts yelling over to me, 'Mommy, I swimming, I swimming!' It was music to my ears - my swimming legacy lives on!

Fridays

I just got off the phone with my husband where I subjected him to my normal Friday afternoon meltdown. It was the normal conversation and it went something like, "I cannot spend one more day at home alone with the children. Can I resign this position? No. It's not fair! You can resign from your job any time you want to!" My husband, who is an extremely wise man, decided to just go along with the rant and said that it is true that he could resign his postion anytime and that I can't. He also always says that he knows I can do it and that I am good at what I do.

On these Friday afternoons I often think about the old sitcom joke where moms are sitting around in the afternoon drinking heavily. I am here to tell you that after five years of devoting my life to the raising of children, it's no joke. I can honestly see how women would just tune out and take a drink or two to get them through to the weekend.

What to do? I can't sit around ranting all afternoon. I can't resent the fact that my husband is working hard to provide us with what we need while I am working hard to get grass stains out of my son's church pants again. I can't just sit in a corner sipping a glass of wine while letting the children go hog wild. Sigh.

What I probably need to do is re-focus. Not look at the drudgery of what I am being asked to do but instead look at the little blessings that have been entrusted to me. I need to stop focusing on the fact that for the fifth morning in a row, my two year old has gone in and wreaked havoc in the bathroom instead of washing her hands for breakfast like she was asked to do. Instead I should dwell on the fact that she has asked every afternoon this week to listen to her brother's VBS songs and has sung along to them at the top of her voice while dancing around the living room. Maybe then I wouldn't have my normal Friday afternoon breakdown.

If You Can't Take the Heat

This summer Pittsburgh has seen record breaking temperatures and very dry weather. The past few days it has been over 90 degrees. I feel truly blessed to live in a house with air conditioning. The kids and I are either in the house or at a pool somewhere. We haven't spent too much time outside over the past few weeks.

When I was growing up, we didn't have air conditioning. No one had it, though, so it didn't seem like we were deprived in any way. During the few really hot weeks during the summer, we would just suffer through it, go to the local swimming pool, or run through the sprinkler in our backyard. The only time it seemed bad was trying to sleep through a hot and humid night.

Fortunately, we had a neighbor with a large front porch and lived during a time when a child being kidnapped was almost unheard of. Our neighbors had three boys and three girls and the youngest girl, thankfully, was my age and a good friend. On those unbearable nights, we would throw down some mats and sleeping bags on their front porch and sleep outside where we could at least have an occasional breeze blow over us. In the mornings my mom would call my name and I would run down the block to my house for breakfast.

As I supervise my two kids playing in the backyard (since our kids are no longer safe playing in their own yard), I am thankful for the air conditioned house that I live in and that my kids get to grow up with that perk. I'm also sad, though, that they won't be able to enjoy a neighborhood campout on a front porch when things get a little too hot inside.

Amusing Ourselves to Death

Anyone who has read the book Amusing Ourselves to Death by Neil Postman can probably skip this post. I have nothing to add to this brilliant book written by Mr. Postman. Having grown up in the generation that saw the birth of MTV, HBO, and hundreds of TV channels to choose from, I was intrigued by a book that dives into the implications of all the TV watching we do in the United States.

This book shows the evolution we have gone through - from a print-based society to a TV based society and all the things we have lost because of this and the very few things we have gained. When our country was first settled, most of the men could read and a majority of the women could read as well. Something unheard of in that day and age. I'm not sure we could post the same literacy statistics today that our country did in the 1700s. Sitting through a political debate of 7 hours between Abraham Lincoln and William Douglas was something almost anyone could do and wanted to do. I doubt my short attention span could make it much past the 45 minutes most public speakers use as their guideline today. One of the most convicting things that Mr. Postman brought up - Could President Taft, who weighed over 300 pounds, become our president today in a society so caught up in visuals? I don't know about you, but I doubt it. His not-so-perfect looks would have overridden the fact that he was a good president.

In the 1970s, Johnny Carson had a nutritionist on his show and asked her what is the one piece of advice she would like to give everyone. Her answer? "If it's advertised, don't buy it." For obvious reasons, this never made it onto the air. If a company is spending billions on TV advertising, they are not spending the money they need to on quality food. I'll save my views on nutrition and where so many of us go wrong in that area for another day. The nutritionist's quote is a good one to think on when it comes to TV watching in general. Everything on TV is driven by getting advertising and not necessarily by what is best for us or what is the truth. If a show isn't entertaining, people won't watch it, and advertisers won't buy ads. That is the bottom line.

Read this book if you've got the time this summer - you won't be disappointed. This book validated my household's rule of one video each day at the most - a video with no commercials. My children have never asked for a specific toy for Christmas or for their birthdays. Why not? They've seen so few commercials and have no ideas so many toys exist out there or that they could ask for a toy and get it. Their world just doesn't work that way. It's a world, incidentally, where my 5 year old is reading and my 2 year old is starting to count. I think we'll keep things commerical free for the long-term.